A Fine Scabs Christmas lyrics

It was Thursday night in Jerusalem And it was cloudy and mean Ole Jesus went out on the town To get himself some of that turpentine He went into a bar and said, "Can I get a shot of that mead" The bartender not recognizing ole Jesus said, "There's something that you'll need" Well now ole Jesus got carded on Christmas It was such a sight And Santa's got a boner and he's fucking my daughter Ooohhh on Christmas night It's a fine Scabs Christmas Here in purgatory All the angels have on fake dicks It's just that same ole story We're going to hell We're gonna spend Christmas in hell All I want for Christmas is for you to stick your finger in my nuts All I want for Christmas is for you to stick your tongue all over my nuts And then I might stick my little christmasy finger in your butt There was a little boy born in a manger And they called him Jesus Christ His mother was a virgin but somehow she still had lice "Now how'd you get those crabs, mother Mary?" Ole Joseph did inquire Then Jesus popped out and he said, "I'm your sire I am the Son of God I am the Son of God I am hungry but I am the Son of God And so they invented Melba toast But Jesus got carded on Christmas I've got a scab on my Christmas